Karma Comedian

Sometimes it takes me several blogs to get a subject out of my system. In an earlier post(two, actually)I talked about the difficult people in one's life: the first blog talked about them in the workplace and how I don't have to have the "game face" anymore- well, since I'm out of the game; and the second extended that to the world of music and gigs. 

Strangely enough(or maybe not, considering the 'artistic temperament' and all), I've had at least as many jerks over the years in bands as I have working a dayjob. One big reason why many folks start their own bands. At least you have the ability to control your personnel. If anyone's gonna be a jerk, it can be you. 

But enough of all that! Yes, people can be difficult. And no, you don't escape them- even though in retirement you always have the option to walk away. That said, these folks still have a place in our lives. An unwanted place, but a place nonetheless. A significance. And rather than decrying their presence in our lives, why not celebrate it?

Well maybe celebrate is too strong a word. Sounds almost masochistic. Still, why not note their presence in our lives? Maybe they exist to show us how not to behave in life. Maybe through their treatment of us, they're helping us repay a Karmic debt(yeah, that one is a long shot, even though I sometimes think that somewhere back there, I was a tall person who was rude to a short one). But we certainly remember them. Like the song, whose lyrics go scratch your name into the fabric of this world, they've certainly etched theirs in our psyches. 

I could see having something along the order of an Awards Dinner, for all the people who've been assholes to me in life- and by this I don't mean just an isolated derogatory remark, more that at some point they were the asshole in my life. Each of these persons would be called up to the stage to receive their very own Personal Certificate. Suitable for framing, this certificate would have their name at the top, a brief summary of their accomplishments(essentially, what won them this award)-and, yes, the word asshole to follow. And I'd want it in big and bold enough font so as to be viewable from a distance. 

The movie Pink Flamingos has a scene in which Connie and Raymond Marvel are "convicted" of assholism by Divine(the movie's protagonist)and "her" son Crackers. I suppose I'm convicting these folks- only in a much less inflammatory manner. And without the Ballmerr accent..

Really, it's more like I'm letting them go. Exorcising them from my psyche. My Awards Dinner for the Assholes in my Life is my way of releasing them. And one thing sticks with me from my road-musician days, something the bandleader used to say when he'd wax philosophical(well, besides the standard jibe to any tableful of people: that looks like the Last Supper on a liquid diet!): that we are all the bane of someone's existence. 

So I might just have an Awards Dinner or two to attend myself. As an honoree..