Another Tasteless Post from Rog'

As a college kid, I found myself doing the asanas pictured here on more than a few occasions. (Boy, I thought I was just drunk on my ass. I had no idea I was doing anything spiritual!) 

Yeah, here he goes with that Hindu shit again--asanas are postures, positions used in the practice of Yoga. And of course there are many divergent forms of Yoga itself: Bhakti Yoga, Hatha Yoga, Kundalini Yoga, among others. Different approaches perhaps, but they all endeavor to take you to the same place. 

These three Yogis have clearly reached a transcendent state of being, from their faithful practice of the asanas of Irish Yoga. It looks as if they've added alcohol to the ritual as well. Being of Irish and Scottish ancestry, I feel I can tell the following joke with relative impunity:

How can you tell when an Irishman's really drunk?
When he's lying on the ground and waving his arms to keep from falling any farther. 

And this one:

What's the difference between a Scotsman and The Rolling Stones?
The Stones sing, "Hey you get off my cloud", while a Scotsman says, "Hey McLeod, get off my Ewe!" 

And having no sense of political correctness(in fact, a contempt for it, for its very anality), I feel I can tell these with that same impunity:

What's the difference between a Jewish pedophile and a regular one?
A Jewish pedophile says, "Hey, little boy, wanna buy some candy?"

What do Washington, Lincoln and Jefferson all have in common? They were the last white people to use those names. 

This last one I actually told to a black person(sorry, but I just can't bring myself to say African-American. It's that political correctness thing in part, but mostly I just think it's stupid), who immediately burst into laughter.This was on a gig- on which, strangely enough, I was the only white person. I later told this joke to a white person I thought would appreciate it, and the lady tending bar interjected(as perhaps she should've..), "did you tell them that one?!" 

Yes. I did. And they loved it. The musical community here has had its share of in and out groups, at times a disgusting divisiveness and insularity, but between black and white, it's always been an integrated one.Thus there's a lot of joking around about our various cultural differences. And the joking around works because neither 'side' takes it seriously. And also because we're talking institutionally, not personally. We're not attacking individuals. 

This is the only time I'm in any kind of agreement with the euphemistic parlance of political correctness. When individuals are involved. I don't like the idea of being given a script of any kind, which political correctness endeavors to do(you should call them this..)but I still think it's hurtful to just arbitrarily bring up the fact that someone's shorter or taller or lighter or heavier than average. It automatically sets them apart, even ostracizes them a bit. 

Part of it is just a perceptual thing. The "deviations" from the norm are the first things you notice, and it seems harmless to just blurt them out: "hey, big Dan! Little Carol!"(As a person shorter than average, I envy those of average height, because they're not noted, labeled. They just slip on by..You never hear anyone saying, "hey, medium-sized Fred!"). Much as I love women with large breasts, this has given me new sympathy for them, since those are always the first thing you notice(no matter how gentlemanly you're trying to be..).

I don' t care for short jokes, because they're personally injurious. It's been a disadvantage in life, so there's nothing particularly funny about it. But I like Irish and Scottish jokes. I'm fine with the insinuations that we're a bunch of drunks and bugger farm animals, because they're cultural insinuations. 

And I'd love to hear some white people jokes. I know they exist, and have begged a black friend or two(oops, I mean African-American- no I don't)to tell me a few. So far, no soap. Just one about all white people dying off and the elevators being quiet. Yes, Muzak- a cornerstone of My White Heritage! A cultural stereotype! Love it! 

So no, I guess I'm not very politically correct. I still say Merry Christmas, still say black(I was almost gonna sic Bill Cosby on ya, with his quote--verified by Snopes--on that whole African-American thing, but naah), and have never used the politically correct phrase making love. No, it's still screwing, shagging, boffing or just plain coitus, as far as I'm concerned. 

Once on an episode of Cheers, Carla referred to one of her sexual escapades as, "once I was makin' love with this guy.."And this still rings false with me. It sounds interpolated, redacted for correctness.Actress Rhea Perlman would read the line thusly, but it's something her character Carla Tortelli would never say. No, Carla would use one of my words . Well, maybe not coitus.

The only term I've seen recently that makes any sense, as far as all this correctness crap is LGBT. Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgendered. Sounds descriptive without pretending to be something else. Though I gotta say, the first time I saw LGBT I thought they were talking about Golf.