Friday, July 14, 2006

Spoiled Celebrity Camp

Well I guess we as fans are really to blame, as far as celebrities' "bad behavior". We give them all that adulation(and money), blowing all that smoke up their famous asses. We convince them through our adoration that they are the end-all and be-all of this world. Somehow made of different material than us mortals.

Thus it's really our fault when they throw temper tantrums in Nail Salons over the price and punch out 2 employees. Or when they seriously mistreat their own employees. We've caused them to think they're larger than life, and are thus immune from responsibility for their actions.
When one of these famous folks does cross the line legally, and punches someone out, or bashes their car in with a golf club, or causes some other kind of damage, I do think they should pay the price. But I have a slightly different idea of justice.

Spoiled Celebrity Camp.

Yeah. Spoiled Celebrity Camp. A sort of labor camp, but filled with- you guessed it. Upon entry they're stripped of their cel phones and assistants and personal trainers and forced to live in a big dorm with other spoiled celebrities. Meals are eaten in a big cafeteria, where staff frequently disrupt things and butt in just as the celebs themselves have done: 'why is this taking so long?', and my favorite: 'do you know who I am?!'

Their work in the 'labor camp' is not necessarily manual. No back-breaking work in the fields. They'd be working as retail clerks or as personal assistants, and of course taking much abuse in either position..

When celebrities act up, don't throw them in with real criminals. Throw them in with each other. I mean, if you're tried(ideally)by a jury of your peers, wouldn't it make sense to be incarcerated with them as well? Besides, it's more of a punishment, nastier and more insidious, having to be around mirror-images of yourself, as far as your own atrocious behaviour.

So you'd have Martha Stewart sharing a cell with Foxy Brown. Russell Crowe with Bobby Brown. Hypothetically anyway.

For a long time I enjoyed the celebrity news on the inside of the front page of our newspaper. But it's getting tiresome, what with all the Public Tantrums and general self-importance.

And it's not just the rappers. This kinda stuff has been going on forever. I'm remembering The Who trashing hotel rooms, not to mention a few other rockers.

As I said, most of the inmates at Spoiled Celebrity Camp would take customer service or personal assistant abuse as their punishment, but there would be a bit of manual work. Van Halen, who were really softer-core Spoiled Celebrities, would work for some bratty kid who insisted on all the Pink Hearts being taken out of his Lucky Charms..

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Internet Porn Sites

A boner and a credit card can be a dangerous combination.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006


I remember laughing at a certain comic strip in the paper(called "Zits" I believe) about a 15-year-old kid who had 3 blog sites: one about his thoughts, a second one with thoughts about his thoughts, and a third with thoughts about his thoughts about his thoughts. Kinda like concentric circles, each digging a hole deeper into the ground.

Boy, I thought. Typical narcissistically self-absorbed teenager.

Actually though, sometimes you just plain need several sites, as you have several different directions. So at this point I continue with this site, which is general rants n' raves. And I have another one devoted to music and issues thereof: and yet another one devoted to reviews of stuff, so far movies:

My original place for writing was the News page of my "regular" musician site. But the writing started veering off into other areas so I started this one. Then the entries in here started veering back into music. So I had to develop separate "slots" to drop my different ideas into. Hopefully I'll be able to contribute something to each of these different sites on a regular basis. I've done some work on both the other sites listed so they may have something entertaining for you to read.

Stay tuned. More to come.